Marriage is a new chapter that comes to a point in the lovers’ relationship where they have committed themselves into not only spending the rest of their lives together but as well as building a family that the couple will raise in the future. Some couple may come up with this decision in life in just a short period of time thinking that everything will work in their favor. There are a few people who believed that marriage is another chapter in life in which it should be prepared for a longer period of time while others consider it as a gift to give the couple blessings with their life together as what their respective religion says. Usually, long term couples resort to marriage when they felt that they fully know their partner very well, and that they are all ready to face this new chapter in their relationship. Easy to say for some people but there are instances where the couple is faced with new challenges with their married life. It could be the change of attitude of the partner or some conflicts with the decision making and other issues or sometimes even with dealing with the family members of the husband or the wife can add some thinking to the side of the pair. The life of a person being married will really test the patience and understanding of both parties when they are already living in the same roof and are cutting back on relying too much to the family they’ve grown up with for many years.

Wedding arrangements are usually prepared by both couple and with all the planning for the big day, sometimes it tests the couples’ relationship with each other and one can have a glimpse of how their partner will behave in the coming days of their married life. Some would like a very lavish wedding and inviting all the people who have been a part of their life believing that this event will only happen once in their life. Some would prefer a simple celebration since the couple has been practical in spending time and money for the wedding and for them what really matters most is that they will spend the rest of their life with the one they wanted to spend it with.

Time may come that each one of us will have to make the decision of getting the life of being married and just like any other relationship even marriage life will give you obstacles and challenges you have to face together with your partner. One may want to consider giving enough time to think before finally deciding into settling down. Whatever happens, this marriage life is faced not only by oneself because during this time one will have somebody to walk this journey with.

See some traditional wedding customs, which are practiced until today, which surely will make one wonder about its existence.

Scotland: Blackening the Bride

This is a pre-wedding tradition originated in Scotland. “Blackening the Bride” serves as a preparatory stage of the bride before the wedding day. The process starts by filling the bride to be with mixed substances. The substance commonly consists like sauces, eggs, feathers and the like which eventually is gross and black after mix. The blackening sometimes calls for a surprise.

After blackening the bride to be, a parade around the town is set. She is to be exposed to the town’s folks with all the black mixture substances around her body.

Sweden: Stolen Kisses

In Sweden, guests have an opportunity to kiss either the groom or the bride.

The kissing of the bride or groom happens during wedding banquets. Whenever the groom is out of sight, men guests may steal a kiss to the bride. The same thing is done whenever the bride is out of sight; women are allowed to steal a kiss to the groom.

France: Clanging Pots and Pans

This after-wedding tradition is known as “Chiverie”.

Chiverie is a wedding joke wherein friends and family of the newly married couple gather in the evening same date of the wedding day. The gathering is intended to disturb and interrupt the couple by ringing bells, blow horns and most commonly clang pots and pans.

The newlywed couple is to come out in a room upon hearing the noise. They are to provide refreshments to the people disturbing them. The newlyweds are expected to still wear their wedding attires.

Italy: Keeping of the Talisman, Wearing of the Veil and Vase Shattering

In Italy, the groom is expected to keep a talisman, an iron amulet. The talisman is to be kept on his pocket on the wedding day. They believed that the talisman serves as the item that removes misfortune.

The bride’s veil must be worn too during the wedding day. The veil protects the bride from evil spirits.

Before the wedding day ends, the newlyweds are to shatter a vase of glass. The number of shattered pieces represents the number of years the newlywed couple would spend as happily married people.

Ireland: Both Feet on the Floor

Irish people believed that fairy loved beautiful things. The most beautiful thing that what fairy loves is the bride. Thus, when the newlywed couples’ dance in the wedding reception, the bride must remain her feet touch against the floor. If the bride was to have on foot off the floor when dancing, she might be easily swept away by the fairies.

Also during the old days, salt and oatmeal are served to the couples at the beginning of the wedding reception. Three mouthfuls are to be taken as a protection against the power of evil.

The bride and the groom are not allowed to sing at their own wedding. To wear green clothes brings bad luck too.

Germany: Kidnapping the Bride and Broken Dishes

This ritual from Germany starts when friends of the bride and groom will kidnap the bride. The bride is to be hidden somewhere which automatically tasks the groom to find her.

The search for the bride begins when the groom asks for help from his friends by treating them all a drink. The search starts in the local pub.

Another tradition is the shattering of dishes before the wedding. After dishes are shattered, the couples to be should clean the mess up as a preparation of their new lives together.

Being in a relationship opens up a whole new perspective when it comes to sharing your life with another. Your personal space is lessened for a fact. The things that you do alone normally change dramatically for it could be that you would be sharing it with another person, or it would have to be readjusted to compromise to the other’s interest.

People enter  a relationship with a bag full of expectations and hopes. Secret demands are expected from the individuals involved. Normally, when these expectations and demands are met it seems to be the happy story. However, then the truly endearing relationship is nurtured on a different basis.

When a relationship is in its infancy, conflicts are expected. Definitely, you are two very different people. You have different values, attitudes, personalities and were raised differently.  Especially for the first timers the happiness depends on what is received. Relationship based on this principle is bound to get tired and could be fleeting.

A relationship should be based on feeling joyful, even if expectations are not met and, even if situations are difficult. This may sound too idealistic, but it is the most sensible decision to make if you wish to keep a positive relationship. This kind of attitude is a choice. When you decide to love someone, it should not end with the feeling. It should be worked upon..

When you are in a relationship, you want everything to be perfect. You want your partner to live up to what you have been imagining to be. With the person closest to you, it is so easy to find faults. It is so easy to find faults in their actions and put the blames on their attitudes. We have to remember that you cannot control anybody but yourself. So instead of putting the blame on the other person, try to ponder on how you reacted and manifested your feelings when the situation is not good. The individuals should be open-minded and accept that the other person has the right to express himself and be himself. The expectations of how the other person should react, usually get in the way and dim our better judgment.

It is also very important to practice true giving. Giving wholeheartedly without expecting back is important. Giving should be about the other person. It should be about making the other feel good and not about expecting something more.

Listening is also very helpful. People in general want to be heard and valued. It is best to stop commenting and criticizing about the other when in conflict. Listen and try to understand where he is coming from. Eventually, resentment would dissipate when people are being listened to.

Acceptance is also very essential. Wanting to change the other person could not just hinder his growth but also affect the way he sees himself. He could feel inadequate and could affect his behavior towards a relationship. Loving someone is about accepting someone for who he is and definitely for whom he is not. We have to understand the fact that each of us is placed here on earth not to make others happy but to develop into their own self. Acceptance and respect for whoever the person has become is very important.

In relationships, patience is a must. Patience towards one another is one important factor that everyone  has to learn.

A relationship should have room for each other to grow, to develop deeply the respect and love for each other. Apart from that, a relationship is worked on. Feelings are involved, yes, but the commitment to make it work definitely is a choice.

First, there should be mutual respect.  In a relationship, respect for each other is very important.  Meaning, each one values who the other is and accepts him or her for what he or she is.  Each partner understands each other without setting limitations and boundaries.  Each one is free to do what he or she wants to do without getting afraid that his or her partner might be angry or might not like what he or she is doing.

Second, every person should have trust.  This quality must be possessed by every partner to make a healthy relationship.   Being jealous is a natural emotion.  What matters is how one reacts into his jealousy and there should be limitations on it.  There should be a sense of trust and always think that his or her partner is not cheating on him.  Without trust, love will surely fail.

Third is honesty.  This quality goes hand in hand with trust.  For without trust, it is very hard for each one of you to be honest.  Every little thing you do and will be doing, always think of being honest.  Never ever do a dishonest act towards your partner so that he or she will not lose trust on you.

Fourth is being supportive towards your partner.  One should not only support his or her partner in times of difficulty and trials.  Even in times of happiness and success, your other half should also celebrate with you.  During moments when you really need your significant half, he or she should be there and lend his shoulder for you to cry on.

Fifth is, there should be fairness and equality between the two of you.  Give and take should be applied in every relationship. You should take turns in everything you decide upon.  You must see to it that each of you is agreeable with your partner’s decision.  And it should not be a “me-me decision”, instead a “me and you”.

Sixth is, you should have separate identities.  Always remember that each one of you has separate lives even before you had your present relationship.  You set compromises with each other. However, it does not mean that you will stop your world on your partner and lose out on being yourself.  You have to live separate lives without losing your partner.  You have to continue seeing your friends and spend time with your respective families, without failing to meet your obligation with your other half.

Lastly, is to have good communication.  A healthy relationship requires constant communication.  Being open with each other is very important.  If one has a problem and has something he or she dislikes with his or her partner, he or she should be open to his or her other half so that everything will be settled and talked upon.  A sense of openness and belongingness should always be present.

With all these qualities, your relationship will have a long way to go.  And everything will run smoothly and both of you will live a happy and healthy life.